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The desire to be free |
I was 18 years old and wanted to enter university. I wanted to
join the college to become the captain of a ship. I was invited to an
interview. There were hundreds of people for the interview. The queue moved
very fast and stopped one of them who came out to ask what they had been asked.
One of them said they asked him his name. Another said that they asked him the
time.
After three hours it was my turn. I took off my glasses and my
watch. I knocked very loudly on the door. There was a panel of about 15 people
in the interview room. One of them asked me my name. I shouted out my name and
was invited into the room. I had checked the time when I went in 10.10am.
Before the interview I had checked up in the newspapers and magazines
about ships and the sea and had memorized as much as I could even though I had
to read in the shops because I couldn't afford to buy the magazines.
One of them asked me why I want to become a captain. I told them
that I like the ocean and was a man of the ocean whose father gave him many
books about the ocean. Then one of them asked me the time. I told them I would
check the wind. I looked outside and told them its 10.22. They were surprised.
I told them my grandfather had taught me how to tell time from the shadows made
by the sun. They asked me what my grandfather had been. I told them he was a
shepherd who had taught me in the summer about the sun and how to tell the
time. This was their longest interview for the morning.
Then they asked me what I would do if I was on the ship and the
family called to ask me to leave the ship because my father has 10 hours to
live. I would call the office to ask for permission. Then they said what if it
is a public holiday and no one is in the office. I said that I would not leave
the ship. The men on the panel said that I should jump. They were all
shouting at me that I should jump into the sea. I shouted that I would not jump
into the sea because of the sharks and I am afraid of sharks. If I jump into
the water then I would not reach the shore. The men on the panel all laughed at
me. I told them that I would need a helicopter to reach my father in
time. Each of them stood up and shook my hand and told me that I was accepted
for the medical check up.
I went and passed every test. The last test was for eye sight. I
memorized the eye test chart and knew the sequence upwards and backwards over a
few days.
I watched them test the person before me. The person had to name
different pictures. I memorized the words in each page. When it was my turn the
phone rang and she answered the phone and was playing and spinning the book.
She opened the book from behind and I didn't know.
The test was for colour blindness and the pictures were in
different colored circles. I could not see the pictures because I was colour
blind. I gave all the answers but of course they were incorrect. I did not know
that I was colour blind.
She called the doctor to test me again. The doctor used the eye
chart to test me. I had memorized the chart. My eye sight is weak. She told me
that me eyes are amazingly good. I had missed one of the lines and that gave me
away. I was desperate to get into the college.
She told me that it would be too dangerous to be a captain of a
ship if I was colour blind since I would have many people's lives in my hands
as the captain of a ship. After a few months they invited me to study to become
an engineer on a ship.
In the interview you were asked ideological questions about
Sharia, the Koran and other similar questions. I grew a beard before the next
interview. I dressed like a very religious person.
While I was sitting there a man came out and saw me and asked why
I was sitting in the queue. I told him that I had come for the interview. He
told me that because I had been in the war that I should come in and eat and I
waited there for four hours. The boss came to interview me.
He asked me a lot of question about religion. He asked if I was
married. I said I wasn't because I was only 18 years old. He asked if I had
gone to war and I said no my mother didn't allow it. Then they asked again if I
am married, I told them I am only 18 and don't yet have a job to take care of a
wife. He kept asking the same question.
I asked him if he has a sister. He asked why. I told him then if
he has a sister I could get married to her. He became angry. He said you didn't
yet see my sister. I told him that he is a good looking man so his sister must
be beautiful too. He shouted at me and chased me out of the room.
It was important that I be married because the training was in
Belgium. They feared that the men would not return to Iran after the training
but if they were married then they would have to come back to Iran. I
left and went to shave my face then went back. I told them that this is the
real me and that I don't want to join them. I decided that I want to be
free.